your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
