my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
