marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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