it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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