Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
