that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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