ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I am available for nakedness
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
