Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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