just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
