i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
We left an ass print on the piano.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
