called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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