please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize