i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
