you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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