Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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