i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
My butt remains clenched, sir.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
