I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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