We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
the raccoons are back...
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