no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
