Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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