weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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