who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
wow bdsm is so cute
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