The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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