If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
