I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize