did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
