normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
