Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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