Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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