Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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