Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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