What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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