brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
