Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
