stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
