i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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