So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
