ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
As shirtless as possible
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
