are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
