Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
