I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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