He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Rumble strips road head = magical
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Randomize
