I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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