btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
