I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
