Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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