The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
