so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
