Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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