You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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